<>Week 7- Culture<>

“When I went back to school, things were different. Girls I use to know had left; when I asked about it, people shrugged and said they had probably gone to be married. This had happened before, from time to time; even in primary school, one girl left because she was betrothed. Somehow, though, I had never really noticed before.
Now I saw Latifa, one of the Arab girls from the coast, had suddenly disappeared from our classroom. According to Halwa, one Saturday afternoon Latifa’s father told her that she was never going back to school; the time had come for her to become a woman. A classmate had been invited to Latifa’s wedding, and she talked about it. The groom was older, from Mombasa; there had been lots of presents. Latifa had looked frightened; she had cried, and her tears stained the dress she wore, which had been stiff and white.” (pg 77)

For this week, I went back to where I had found a slew of cultural differences because a lot of what Ayaan experiences at this age is much different from what is experienced by American adolescents. After Ayaan’s injury from her mother beating her at home and her teacher beating her in school, she needed a lot of time to recover (ending up to be described as several years so that her wounds could adequately heal). Later, when she returned to school, she observes that many of her classmates have been married off already, explaining their disappearance from the classroom. It surprised me that Ayaan was surprised at this, because in one’s own culture, things are more of a norm and marrying off in high school isn’t any different than the beatings that go on in the classroom, etc. This is just so very different from what occurs in the lives of high school students in America in 2008. If any student were to take a few years off due to injury (this would be unlikely due to the extent that students are catered to with adaptations so that missing school is not the first option—maybe even the last!) and return about two years later, they would not find that their classmates have been married off. Instead they may find that some people have switched schools to better meet their academic or artsy needs, and once in a very rare while will there be a pregnancy, but often those girls try and return to school. I couldn’t imagine what it would be like to learn that my female classmates were married off while they were between the ages of 15 and 19. This is a huge cultural difference between what is acceptable for stopping the education that is a blessing in the first place to leave and fulfill duties as a woman of Allah.

<>Week 7- Letter<>

Dear Ayaan,

Listening about your life is very interesting when it comes to expanding my horizons from my American/West African/Edina bubble. Hearing about what you experienced at my age is really fascinating to be able to compare. My life is so much more oriented towards what I want and making the best possible life for myself as an individual, not towards a husband and family environment. My parents always told me that if I cannot be independent, that they have not done their jobs as parents. However, it seems to be the exact opposite for you. Your family only permits you to get an education because that is what you wanted so badly, not because it will further you as a person. In your culture, it is important that females do not gain enough knowledge to be independent from men, because that is very frowned on. Women should “need” the men in order to be able to survive and flourish. The American norm for teenagers is allow them to grow and become independent so that they evaporate from the responsibilities of the adults who no longer want to be the disciplinarians.
I was also thinking about this book in comparison to the graphic novel we read in class, Persepolis. I see many similarities between you and Marji. Both of you are young women who are essentially suppressed by age and gender. Despite it being unusual for young women to be interested in politics and challenging things for why the way they are it is interesting to hear your perspectives on the events that you voice your opinion on. However, Marji has the support of her parents who believe in the same cause as she does and are willing to guide her in furthering her education and independence. Your parents do not believe in questioning anything, which is sad. You seem to have an adventurous mind that shouldn’t go to waste.

Even though I’m beginning to be able to tolerate the book…it is still very very whiny.

<>Week 6-Culture<>

"Normally she would grab me and then tell me to lie down on my belly on the floor and hold my ankles, sot hat she could tie me up for my beating. My mother used to beat us only on our arms and legs. But now I refused to lie down and hold my ankles as I should. She pulled my hair--on the side where I was hurt--but I didn't care anymore. I wouldn't do it...Ma demanded that Mahad help her get me down. I told him, in English so she wouldn't understand 'Please don't do it. Yesterday she beat me and I was beaten by the ma'alim. Nw they are beating me the same way. I do all the work here and it isn't fair'" (pg 75-76)"

For this week, I chose a passage from what stuck with me the most. While reading this book, sometimes it gets very long, and repetitively whiney. However, this really made me think about how her education is compared to mine.I am very appalled at some of the "punishments" that occurred in her schooling and all around domestic life. It is unbelievable to think that such treatment goes unnoticed. I can't really determine whether it is cultural or more religion based. Ayaan, feeling blessed enough to have the opportunity to be educated doesn't complain when her mother assigns her more chores so that she has difficulty finishing her homework. This reflects on her grades and then her mother actually says to her "How did I end up with three children and one of them is a retard?". My mother would never say anything of the sort because it obviously lacks compassion. All in all, the beatings that Ayaan received because of how her mother values her as worthless, as well as when she makes some silly decisions really make me think twice and be grateful for the violence free life I have.

<>Week 6-Letter<>

Dear Ayaan,

I was astounded by the amount of violence that your mother and school teachers use to punish you. It is absolutely inhumane. Although teasing the little children and leaving them at the doors of others' homes as a practical joke is cruel, I don't think that being severely beaten by both your school master and your mother were fitting punishments of the crimes. It is difficult to understand why there does not seem to be any adults that truly care for children (unless they are male, but that generally does not make too much of a difference in the long run considering how your mother treats your brother!) and their well being. This is probably just a major difference in dominating cultures in religions, because if such a thing to even one tenth of the level that it happened to you, there would be lawsuits galore. Plus, adults have a lot more genuine care for the young, making sure that they are well taken care of. That is definitely something that I take for granted on a daily basis.
As for how much I am (or am not) enjoying the book, it is relatively tolerable. Give or take, really. Sometimes I wonder if you are legitimately upset about something or if you are just being a whiney complaining drama queen.

-C

<>Week 4- Snow Flower v. Infidel

I was thinking about the similarities between Snow Flower and the Secret Fan in comparison to Infidel. Here's what I'm thinkin'.

SIMILARITY:

The men. It really is all about the men and how they treat and control and dominate the lives of the women.
(1) In both of the books, it is appropriate for the men to have multiple females that they sex with. In SFSF, most wealthy men who are land owners have one/two/three concubines depending on how pleased they are by their wives. In the book Infidel, it isn't uncommon for tradtionalist men to have two wives to help take care of each others kids. Plus, it's all about continuing the bloodline. Whatever it takes, right?
(2) There is a great value in having male children. Lily and Snow Flower go through all these rituals, praying to the gods, eating just so and such to ensure that their first born child is a boy, because that means that they will be taken care of for life. The same goes for Ayaan in Infidel, because of the importance of having produced a male determines how good of a wife one is.

DIFFERENCE:

Snow Flower and Lily do not challenge the ways of society. They are very accepting of the fate that has been predestined by a higher power. Both girls adapt to follow the will of a higher power.
Ayaan Hirsi Ali questions the way society is operated, about why women are so inferior to men and why women for example, must always be accompanied by a man to be noticed. Ayaan is not easily persuaded to just "go with it", but rather asking "WHY!?". Which does get her into trouble!!